PLEASE GHOSTWRITE FOR MY DEMO

I had about six niggas on my payroll
I had a white bitch eatin' out my asshole!

It's de rigeur to hate on SpaceGhostPurrp these days, mainly for his shitty music and personality, but don't act like his YouTube playlists of Memphis rap tapes wasn't lit like Thich Quang Duc. That channel created a new lane for creepy white guys who like Adult Swim, saving the Boneses and Lil Ugly Men of the world the indignity of having to ape Necro in 2010. If Purrp had played his cards right and kept his mouth shut, he could have rode A$AP's Yam to some kind of tastemaker residency at the NYU Institute of Advanced Streetwear or whatever.

What's the next frontier of era mining? I won't be mad if it's Louisiana rap tapes. This early Critical Condition tape ain't a revelation along the lines of "Runnin-N-Gunnin," but I would rather hear a Purrpian rehash of their Rap-A-Lot/Suavehouse rehash than another post-Keef warbler talkin bout the Xans in his YSL fannypack. And their forward-thinking attitude toward buttplay? Callin shots like Nostradanus.

If the rapping sounds especially similar to UGK, it might not be coincidence. Unclear whether they'd hooked up with Pimp & Bun at this point, but 2008 Vibe Noz alleged Bun was writin' they shit on the CC Waterbound LP.

THE SON AND THE FURLY GHOST

Missed this one the first go-round, now resurfacing on a J-Diggs project minus the strong D-Lo and Mistah FAB verses. Some legal shenanigans or a cutting-room dis? IDK. As far as beyond-the-grave performances are concerned, Mac Dre goes harder than Bruce Lee's archival footage in Game Of Death. Is it a coincidence that these two visionaries both loved Hennessy? Kermit drinkin Heem in that teacup, you smell me?

Unfortunately, Nef The Pharoah sees it as an opportunity to indulge in a SNL audition tape Mac Dre impression, instead sounding like spooky Vincent Price. Neffy: Vallejo's eternal little brother. You love the guy, but you also just wanna bully him, give him some swirlies and raise him up the flagpole by his Versace briefs. Maybe hanging out with J-Diggs will toughen him up.

I'M BOUT TO POP A BLOGGA!

Ha ha! Free Roc
I miss my brother, he was just like my pops
A li'l bad motherfucker, ain't nothin other

Attention fetishists, rap-related and beyond: Molly Brazy is a tiny young woman rapping about armed robbery and shooting people. So catchy is the I'm bout to pop a nigga refrain, it begs to be sampled retroactively in a '06 Rick Rock production; all you need is E-40, or his Asian impersonator, to drop the "UUUUUUUUUH." Loafcore takin root, for real: the New Detroit may finally have its own unsavory "Chicken Noodle Soup."

Molly bodies DoughBoy Roc, but the livewire production should be a welcome return to form for anyone unmoved by the whitewashed Gordy-zation of Payroll Giovanni and Cardo's critically acclaimed™ collaboration. Now I know how the O.G. Lemonade and Brownies fan felt when he saw Mark & the boys mugging it up on the beach.