Monday, August 10, 2015

SPECULATIVE FICTION



Going the Eldridge Cleaver route, 2Pac embraces conservatism and becomes frequent guest on Fox News.  His undeniable on-screen chemistry with Jedediah Bila fuels rumors that the two are dating.

Biggie spotted at Brooklyn Fare buying Niman Ranch T-bone steak, artisanal goat cheese, quail egg, and cold-press grape juice.

Career devastated by a Jezebel exposé on his history of domestic abuse, Big Pun is hospitalized for a failed suicide attempt when the beam he used collapses, leaving him bruised and considering gastric bypass.

In the wake of his well-received album on Legal Hustle, Jay-Z is seen shedding a single tear as he plays SXSW to a crowd of hipsters, journalists, and aging backpackers.

Fans of rap and shock radio rejoice when Anthony Cumia takes on Pimp C as co-host.

Big L and ASAP Rocky play Fashion Week in a leather version of this, designed by Alexander Wang.

South Park Mexican receives Medal of Freedom for his significant charitable contributions to Houston-area children's hospitals.

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